A weekend in the Shitty

Friday was really cool, I got a crew to roll up to the city with me. Finally I found people down to hang. Justin, Karen, and I went to Bar None where Shannon was going to meet up with us. Us three walk in and its not packed but there are quite a few people there. They had beer sluts there (well that's what I call them); you know, the girls that pass out keychains (to encourage drinking and driving?) and tell you to buy their beer. Justin was like, "Oh cool they're handing out key chains?" And I said, "Yea just grab one." I tried to get the attention of this chick that thought she was hot shit and she just ignored me. So we were like whatever and sat down at a table. The beer slut came over and was like, "Have you tried Fosters tonight, I mean Pilsner Urquell." We laughed and she said Fosters was last weeks slutting job. We told her we would get it next round, it was only 3 bucks. A waitress stops buy and Justin gets himself and I a Pilsner Urquell and gives her 10 bucks (a 4 dollar tip for those of you who are math-tarted) and she was stoked and all happy. The beer was horrible, I've had it before but couldn't remember how it tasted, I should have known that it was bad if it didn't stick out in my mind. We choke it down and the beer slut comes back and asks how was it. Justin asks what she things of it and she says likes it but touches her face. I tell her that when people lie they touch their face, which is true I read it somewhere (are you sure you read it somewhere or maybe you didn't. Oh that's right)..Family guy. So Justin touches is face and says, "In that case, I like it too." Beer slut didn't think this was funny so she leaves. The waitress walks by again and I step out and hold out my hand and say "hey..." As if to get another round. The bitch looks right at me and keeps on walking. I look at Justin and Karen and was like what the fuck. They laugh and I figure its not a good night to be talking to women for Dustin. So we don't get any drinks from that crack whore, she was a pimply bitch anyways. Shannon rolls up finally and I was stoked because she hasn't met the others yet and I think they'd all get along well. At this time we had a pitch and I pour a glass for Tony who rolled up with Shannon. He takes a sip and Shannon starts taxing his glass while he looks for his girlfriend Crystal. They come back and I pour another one for Tony and Crystal was like, "He doesn't want it, he's not drinking." Which is a lie because he just started the other beer. So I give it to him and he starts drinking it and Justin says, "Well its obvious he does because he's drinking it." Crystal gives him a dirty look, I thought it was because I didn't introduce them yet. So I introduce them and she looks like she's forced to shake his hand and gives the most sour look towards him. Justin was like what the fuck. So obviously Justin and I are sharing this special magic with the ladies tonight. Karen comes back from the bathroom and gets hit on by this greasy looking Mexican guy. So she still has her charm, not like the quality was there but she's got quantity over us. But the four of us (Shannon, Karen, Justin, and I) had a good time while Tony and Crystal talked to another couple from Navato, which Shannon told me is in the North Bay instead of the East Bay which I said earlier. Shannon and I drank moderately which is a little more than normal people because Justin was pretty drunk and Karen was wasted (but not waishted). I had a Kettle One Tonic for Andrea like I said I would (WHERE YOU AT GIRL!!!!); its like pouring a 40 for your homies, but you know its better because you get wasted and honor a friend. After Shannon leaves with her brother, we go and get pizza just to hide the alcohol breath I had. It was fun, Karen was wasted in the pizza place, I took pictures, it was funny.

The next night I have a date with Serena from the first blog. And of course I was late as always (I'm late, I'm late, for a very important date)...Alice in Wonderland. It was really great, I took her to the Stinking Rose, which is a really great restaurant. I made reservations and the recording is a "Vampire" and he's says, "Well-come to tha Stinking Rose, a gaaaarlic restaurant." pretty lame, I thought it was funny though. We had a really good time over dinner and shared a bottle of wine. She's really nice and cool too. I was going to take her to this bar after dinner and she told me earlier that her roommates wanted to meet us up at the bar; which I didn't mind. Darren was mad that I didn't watch the Bernard Hopkins fight with him so I told him to meet me up at this bar. While we were at the bar called "Royale" which is has kinda ghetto people but the DJ is cool, I mean he played "It Takes Two" which is a timeless classic. And its only five bones to get in. Nick calls me randomly and was he says, "Hey I'm up in the city and everybody bailed on me." So I told him to roll over too. Darren rolls in with Robi, I didn't know that Robi was coming. So while Darren was gettin drinks Serena comes over and was like, "Is this your brother?" And I said, "Yes"; stoopid Robi says his name is Robi, and she says, "I thought your name is Darren." I cover up by saying, "Oh that's his middle name." Kinda weak but always a save. I don't know why I did it, I felt like joking around and it seemed funny at the time, and it still does. It took a few minutes to convince her to believe that Darren was my brother, although that Robi and I look about as much alike as Darren and I. Darren said, "What do I embarrass you?" Hehe...YES, just kidding he doesn't. Later on the night one of Serena's roommates is standing in front of me and as I go to take the first drink from my recently purchased gin and tonic; her elbow knocks it to the ground. A little part of me died, the poor little guy didn't even have a chance, a soldier lost in battle. I said a prayer for him and he's in Gods hands now. Darren and Robi bail early because Robi was driving, so that's no surprise. Nick sticks around because he's too drunk to drive. We go over to get pizza and on the way this other guy that was hanging with one of the roommates says lets walk into a strip club and see if the girls come in. So we do and they get in for free. The Hungry i, the most beat chicks I've ever seen in a strip club, not that I would know or anything. There were better looking girls in the audience, which is good because on a first date I don't want to be staring at nude girls...but the second date... It was my most successful date I've ever been on, I got to eat, drink, AND see naked girls, I just didn't stare. BOOBIES!